Good News???

I thought I'd begin this next entry with some very appropriate words from a favorite song of mine...

Will you fly to me tonight
And bring me your peace
And with your love, lift me up
With healing in your wings
I'm longing for your strength
And rest to my soul
Feeling you near
Offers me hope

********

The entire month of April has been consumed with some random, unexplained illness. Infection? Virus? Serious? Worrisome? Nothing? Honestly, it has left me feeling completely wiped out and feeling less and less like myself everyday. So after a long sleepless night last night, I have decided that the only thing I can do is return to normal life as much as possible regardless of whether I feel "okay" or not. I feel so much better having made that decision and I've realized that sometimes the answers and explanations don't come immediately or even in a "timely fashion".
Yesterday was tough. I went back to the doctor... I was completely unprepared for what he was going to say. I had an appointment at 2:20 and by 5 that evening I had gone from a follow-up doctor appointment to being admitted to the hospital for a CT scan of the brain... thankfully the doctors were able to get me the results right away rather than making me wait and worry the entire weekend! The results came back clean... no brain cancer. hmmmm.... that's comforting! :)
So, now I've gone from infection, to virus, to something neurological. My doctor sent me for the scan because I'm having a hard time getting the right side of my body to work. My arm is really weak and my hand tremors for no apparent reason, and my leg is painfully stiff and pretty weak as well.
So... we are just going to play the "wait and see" game. I'm not necessarily happy about that... I want an answer now... who wouldn't!?

Anyway, my dad put it this way... Doctors work in what we call a "practice". Regardless of how long they've been a doctor, they are still "practicing" medicine. Not every patient or illness is the same, so not every diagnosis is black and white. The doctor will eventually find out what's wrong... it may just take some time.
So not the answer I wanted!!! :) Why do dads always know exactly what to say???

The health update...

So, after a second trip to the doctor (this time I saw my parent's family physician)... I do not have a bacterial infection, but a virus. Labyrinthitis to be exact. Because it's a virus, it can't be cured with medication, so I just have to wait it out. The virus can last anywhere from a week and a half to three weeks. I am at 2 weeks and very ready to be over this.
Labyrinthitis attacks the inner ear, which affects balance and causes vertigo. The virus has also attacked my facial nerve endings causing a mild form of Bell's Palsy. The right side of my face is numb, kind of like I've just been to the dentist and had that side of my mouth numbed... it's more of a discomfort than anything serious. Bell's Palsy is temporary and usually clears up on its own within one to two months... (yeah me!).
I'm being hopeful... the doctor gave me Cortisone/Prednisone shots to ease the pain while I wait out the virus. If I'm not feeling 100 percent better in a week, then we are moving on to blood work and an MRI... let's hope I'm feeling better in a week!!! :)
No worries though... I'm looking forward to feeling completely healthy again! The doctor was very positive.

I really am so grateful for all of you... countless people have just gone out of their way to help me either emotionally, physically or mentally. I really do LOVE you all!!!

Diagnosis: VeRtiGo

If you don't know what vertigo is and have never had it before.... I pray you NEVER have to find out! I'm a relatively healthy person, so when I woke up to the room spinning out of control last Monday morning I was soooooo scared! Feeling like you are on a roller coaster ride that you can't get off of is pretty terrifying. Eyes open or shut, the room just kept spinning which of course lead to motion sickness. Trying to walk was "interesting"... my equilibrium was completely out of whack, so I would just tip over when I stood up. I literally laid in bed for 6 days.
After 2 days in bed and a long talk with my dad (he's a retired paramedic and worked in the ER for years... so I trust his judgement), I gave in and went to the doctor. Honestly I don't know what was scarier... the tone in my dads voice when he told me to go the doctor immediately or the look on the doctors face when he told me how lucky I was that I came in when I did. I have never been to the doctor for anything even remotely serious, so I guess I didn't understand the urgency of it all until the doctors face turned from pleasant to concerned.
As of right now the doctors think my vertigo happened because fluid had somehow collected behind both of my eardrums and an infection had begun.
I'm not out of the woods yet either. After a week of antibiotics and medication overload, my head is still pretty cloudy, the dizziness continues, I have a headache that won't subside and my ears, neck, jaw, shoulders and arms are still very sore.
Lesson learned: if things don't feel right with your body... listen to your body and GO TO THE DOCTOR!!! Don't wait for it to get better all on it's own, because sometimes it just won't!

Anyway, I just want to thank ALL of the friends who came to my rescue. Unfortunately this all happened over spring break and my girls were stuck at home with a mom who couldn't really do anything or go anywhere... so thank you all soooooo much! I just really wanted to thank my sis-in-law Liz for entertaining my little missy, Steph for taking my girls to the Easter egg hunt, my step-mom Nette for doing my laundry, and all of the countless friends who sent well wishes. I really don't know what I would have done without you!!!
I just feel so blessed and so loved! I really have the most incredible friends and family!!!

A little prayer for mom...

Monday morning the alarm went off and as I rolled over to shut it off the room started spinning and wouldn't stop. I thought maybe I was having some sort of nightmare or something, but no, it was all too real. I vaguely remember sending my girls out the door and off to school. I drifted in and out of sleep for most of the day... and when I was thinking clearly, realized that this was anything but normal and wondered if maybe, just maybe, I should go to the doctor.
Later that afternoon I hear my girls return home from school. The only thing I remember is Krystian kneeling on the bed next to me rubbing my forehead with her little hand. Then I hear her say, "Dear Heavenly Father, please help my mommy get better. She's really sick and she needs to get better so she can go to work and go to the store and take care of us. She's such a nice mommy and I love her, so please make her better. (then she leans over and says mommy, I need help with the ending... what do I say again?) in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen"
She then hopped up and went running off to play.
I'm such a lucky mom!

Oh my daughter!

So, I'm at home this week on Spring Break... my girls however are NOT! yay!!!!!!!
Anyway, I got an incredibly weird set of text messages from Kayla this morning as I was enjoying the blissful silence...

Kayla: What movies does Tom Cruise play in?
Mom: Uh... a lot of movies.
Kayla: Like...
Mom: Mission Impossible (It's the only one I could think of!)
Kayla: Besides that...
(Dang now what do I tell her?)
Mom: Top Gun
Kayla: What?... No seriously mom. Is that a real movie? (I guess she's a little young!)
(mom finally wises up...)
Mom: Kayla, are you cheating on a test or something? And it's only 9:30 in the morning... you're not at lunch, so are you texting me during class?
(I have yet to receive a response!!! ...Oh my daughter!)

ps... she finally told me why she was asking.... apparently some boy in class was making fun of her for not knowing who Tom Cruise was. And yes, she WAS texting me durning class!

Someone please humor me by telling me that I will survive the teenage years! :) Honestly, if texting during class is as bad as it gets, I'll count myself LUCKY!!!