I came across
this article last week and it really got me thinking. It's one of those articles that's a little sad in a way, but incredibly true... and then I remembered
this talk by President Uchtdorf from the October 2011 Relief Society general session of General Conference, which I thought went along nicely with the subject.
Articles like this seem to be everywhere these days, and it's sad to think that so many women out there are feeling so much pressure to be everything to everyone, all the time. (I'll admit, I get caught up in this from time to time). The article talks about seeing what others do on Pinterest and Facebook and blogs etc... which then leads to feelings of being overwhelmed and inadequate. It's funny, for me, Pinterest and Facebook don't do this to me. For me Pinterest is purely inspirational, and Facebook, well, I don't get on fb all that often, but I do occasionally love to catch up with friends that don't live so close anymore. I do know however that design blogs, craft blogs, and certain tv programs (design and diy related) tend to leave me feeling a little 'depressed'. I know this about myself though and know that I'm just better off not venturing into that world. So with a little (or a lot) of self discipline, I do my best to just stay away from those things.
I do have to wonder why though; why do we waste our precious time cataloging our flaws, weaknesses and inadequacies? And who's to say that because you don't have an immaculate, neatly decorated home with gourmet meals gracing your dinner table nightly, all while juggling a career and family, with 10 diy projects happening at once, that you are in any way inadequate? It may be what someone somewhere considers underachieving, but let's be realistic... it's really not... realistic, that is!
For me the key is finding my authentic me... I kind of like who I am (most days :) )...
About a year and a half ago I was having a particularly tough day. It was one of those days when every little thing seemed to be a huge ordeal. Day upon day of upset and frustration had built up to this moment of feeling completely unhappy, overwhelmed and inadequate. I was very aware of everything I was doing wrong. One evening during a 'complaint session' to my husband, he asked such a simple question; "well, what makes you happy?"... I honestly didn't know at that moment. In fact, if remember right, I got frustrated with him and told him to go away. It was such a simple question, but so hard to answer at that moment. I had spent so much time focusing on everything I was failing at, that I had forgotten about all I had accomplished. I had forgotten about the happy little things that make me truly feel good at the end of the day. His simple question just wouldn't leave me alone, so I got out a notebook and pen and made a list. I know, it seems silly to make a list of what makes a person happy, but I love lists and knew that if I were going to get this question off of my mind it would have to make its way onto a list. This list really helped me clear through all the junk that had cluttered my life, and helped me refocus my energy into what truly matters to me. I've kept that list to this day. My list makes no mention of losing 10lbs, finishing the basement, organizing my closet, planning some big party or making scrapbooks for all of my kids.
My authentic me finds happiness in cuddling with Krystian reading a book, pouring through paint swatches, tickling Zachary's tummy, teasing my husband, checking my daughter out of school for a 'dr. appt.' and taking her to lunch instead (yes, I'm a rebel, I know), girls nights, rearranging furniture, sketching for hours, and on and on...
President Uchtdorf said it best in his talk... "Never stop striving for the best that is within you. Never stop hoping for all of the righteous desires of your heart. But don't close your eyes and hearts to the simple and elegant beauties of each day's ordinary moments that make up a rich, well-lived life".
